Collaborative Community Builders’ Retreat – Em’s Reflection

Back in late October to early November, I applied for a youth retreat with Righting Relations. At the time, I wasn’t holding a high standard on myself. Whatever happens, I would be happy if I took my chances.

When it came time to write my application, I felt stuck. I wasn’t sure what to say or how to stand out. Then my dad gave me simple advice: talk about what drives your passion. That changed everything. I started writing about my passion for working with individuals with diverse abilities and my interest in making communities more accessible. Once I
focused on that, everything clicked. I knew what I wanted to say and how I wanted to present myself.

When I got accepted, I honestly couldn’t believe it. I remember thinking, wait… me? But I said yes right away. Then I got to work preparing my presentation and thinking about what I wanted to share.

For my presentation, I focused on the idea of Universal Design: creating spaces and systems that work for everyone from the start. I talked about how many older buildings and systems weren’t built with accessibility in mind, which creates barriers for people who need accommodation. I asked questions to get people thinking: How many places in your community are truly accessible? Are doorways wide enough? Are there ramps or only stairs? Is transportation easy for everyone to use?

My goal was to help people notice these barriers and think differently. If we include all voices, especially those who are often left out when designing spaces and systems, we can prevent these barriers from happening in the first place. Instead of fixing problems later, we focus on building communities that are welcoming and accessible for everyone from the start.

Fast forward to January, and we all gathered in Quebec for the youth advocacy retreat with Righting Relations. What started as a group of strangers quickly became a space full of energy, curiosity, and shared purposes. From the first day, it was clear that everyone was here for a reason.

Each presentation felt like a window into someone’s passion. We learned how to navigate media and journalism, explore universal human rights, and discovered how to build community through things like gardens and grassroots organizations. There were sessions on creating zines as tools for advocacy, and conversations around climate change that challenged the way we think about our future. That’s only a glimpse. Every topic carried weight, and every speaker brought something real. You could hear it in their voices: this work mattered to them.

In between sessions, something just as meaningful was happening. Connections are formed naturally. Conversations turned into friendships, and perspectives shifted in ways I didn’t expect. Even in –28 Celsius weather, we were outside. Freezing, but most importantly, laughing. We watched movies, played games, designed zines, and so much more. I left not only with new knowledge, but with people I keep in contact with people who continue to inspire me.

For me, one of the biggest changes was internal. Public speaking had always been a barrier, something that made me hesitate and doubt myself. But being in that environment where everyone was showing up fully as themselves, it pushed me to do the same.
Somewhere along the way, that fear started to feel smaller. Their confidence and passion made me feel comfortable and capable. Growing up; a piece of me felt nervous speaking my mind and standing up for positive change. I think if little me could see how much we have accomplished; she would be so excited and curious on what come’s next.

Looking back, the whole experience feels like proof of something I’m still learning new things. When you follow what matters to you, things begin to open. I went from questioning whether I even belonged there to feeling proud that I showed up at all. And maybe that’s the most important part, not being the most confident person in the room but choosing not to hold yourself back. I am still to this day so impressed and proud of everyone I met, and I hope to see them continue advocating for change and be unapologetically ourselves. I hope everyone, at some point, gets to feel that same kind of pride: the kind that comes from standing behind what you believe in and realizing just how far you’ve come.

— Em Murphy

Em Murphy is a social advocate focused on equal rights for women, neurodiverse communities, and positive social change. She expresses her advocacy through songwriting, presentations, and active community involvement.